Getting a physical in Quito...

...is nothing like getting a physical in the States.  Today, for example, I showed up at my "doctor's appointment" 10 minutes early...and ended up waiting 20 minutes after when my appointment was supposed to be when I finally called him to see where he was. He met me somewhere different in the hospital than where his office technically was.  30+ minutes wasted while I was supposed to be working in the ER (which was only being run by 1 nurse and 2 techs at that point - brand new, less than 1 week experience techs, that is). 

So, I finally meet "the doctor" in charge of occupational health for the hospital. He's actually only a resident. We walked back down to the ER, he circled a lab test, a urine test, and a feces test (to check for parasites), on a sheet of paper.  That concluded my physical.

So I ask him, do I have to pay for these tests? Thinking, they are going to be expensive and I am an employee, so certainly the hospital will cover it (the physical is necessary to getting a contract of employment).  He doesn't know the answer, so we go to human resources. There we wait, and wait. Finally we ask, and the lady sends us to Trabajo Social, social work for employees. The guy, who is brand new, helps us out and gives me a 30% discount for who knows what reason, and we bring my little paper to Lab, so I can pay/get my tests run.  Well, the lab cashier is confused about the 30% thing, so me and the doctor have to go back up to Social work and get it figured out. then we go back to lab, I pay for the exams (a whopping $8.19), and I am told to come back tomorrow...with my urine and stool sample.  But first, I have to go to the Pharmacy and buy a urine cup and stool sample cup (both for only a quarter). 

All in all, I was gone from the ER for about 2 hours...and that is my experience with physicals in Ecuador (although it's not over yet, as I still have the daunting task of collecting my own excrement and traveling down Rumichaca Avenue with it in hand...hopefully the mote I ate today off the street didn't give me parasites, or I see some Albendazole in my future...)